Tuesday, January 29, 2013

grandpa's home.

How must I approach this post? By God's grace... and only by His grace.

My Grandpa Kerwin moved into God's kingdom this afternoon. Last Tuesday we were told that the cancer had spread and that we were just going to keep him comfortable until his time would come. Last Tuesday morning we were still praying big on my Grandpa's behalf. Although I noticed his changes we were still hoping for a different result. On Monday afternoon I announced to the Twitter world that I was feeling extra worn that day + I sent a message to my girlfriends stating that I was feeling overwhelmed due to my gut + the doctor's assumptions. On Tuesday afternoon, Mom and Dad came home with the news that I stated above. Crazy.

I will share more, I promise. I can't wait to write more. These past few months I have not been able to blog as much as I would like. I hate that, but that also leaves a project before me. Whether you like it or not, I'm going to write like there is no tomorrow. You will hear stories about my Grandpa, see pictures, and you will see ugly sides of me + Lord willing a good side as well. I can't share details right now. Let's just say my journal has been my filter and my acquaintances protection these last couple of months! So, tonight will be no different. Then, I will come to you giving honesty with modesty, because you simply must know how God has revealed Himself faithful personally to me through this.

^^almost always wearing a cap.

^^who knows what joke he was coming up with in + around this picture!

^^I can just hear his laugh.

Below are the pictures I thankfully captured in October at our local pumpkin patch. It was when he was still recognizable, but was changing more and more each day. I will treasure these. Oh, I'm gonna miss him.




Below is a drawing I started right before Grandpa's birthday--I drew it a few days after driving to one of his radiation treatments out of town--my view from the backseat. :) I presented the beginning of it to him on his birthday, but finished it this last week, adding the message. It stayed on his sidetable in the hospital and is still on his dresser next to his Uganda hat. :)

We love you, Grandpa. What a treasure it was to know you; to be your granddaughter! Oh, how thankful we are that Kansas was in His plans for us. God knew what He was doing! He knew that we needed these extra memories with you. He knew that we needed to take care of you. He knew that when we moved in with you on August 6, 2010 temporarily that on January 29, 2013 you were going to move from your temporary home. He knew that on January 28, 2013 I would hold your hand in both of mine and celebrate your life at His feet. "Oh, what a friend we have in Jesus..."

Fill the air, Lord Jesus. You are still good and that truth can never be shaken. I am more in love with You than ever before. Thank-you for undescribable peace. Help me to write, to sleep. Remind me that it's okay to cry; I don't have to be a hero, because You are. Lord, I will be faithful and I know you will be great!

Friends, I will be back. Grandpa's home. I would have never chosen this ending, but somehow--somehow it's beautiful.

In my Father's house are many rooms. If it were not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you? --John 14:2
It sounds good enough to us. :)

Weary and rejoicing,



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