#savesaeed

In English I am writing a story about Pastor Saeed. Watch these videos below to learn more about him, his continuing daily persecutions, his perspective, and how you can help!

Join me in praying for Saeed & being challenged by his inspiring, real message.

I got treasure up in heaven; I got dirt all over me,
Emilee

february.

Better late than never, right?
Here is the list of my journal entries from last month. It flew, like always, but sharpening & lovely nevertheless.

• Friday, February 1, 2013. [You Don't Even Want To Know]

• Saturday, February 2, 2013. [Reminders For Next Time]

• Sunday, February 3, 2013. [The Power Of A Hug, The Gift Of Family, and The Continuing]

• Tuesday, February 5, 2013. [A Gorgeous Day]

• Wednesday, February 6, 2013. [Strange And Beautiful]

• Thursday, February 7, 2012. [COMING ATTRACTIONS]

• Friday, February 8, 2013. [Ringing In The New Age]

• Saturday, February 9, 2013. [Substituting For Years Of Friendship]

• Sunday, February 10, 2013. [UNCLEAN]

• Monday, February 11, 2013. [Substituting Continued: A Vulnerable Agony]

• Tuesday, February 12, 2013. [Vulnerable Agony; His Will Be Done]

• Thursday, February 14, 2013. [Life Goes On...]

• Saturday, February 16, 2013. [Check-In]

• Sunday, February 17, 2013. [Heart Pouring Of An Anxious, Beat Up Spirit]

• Monday, February 18, 2013. [First Few Vulnerable Lines]

• Tuesday, February 19, 2013. [Hey Girl, History Repeats Itself]

• Wednesday, February 20, 2013. [List Of Reminders For The Road]

Hope your March has been going well, friends. Teach us to number our days, Jesus.
We pour our hearts out like water before You...

In Abba,
Emilee

living the questions.

"Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves … And the point is to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer."
--Rainer Maria Rilke via Melissa Fitzpatrick's tumblr.

 

The Lord is teaching me about patience... about questions... about the beautiful mystery... about listening. I claim I can't hear His voice, but I won't stop talking myself.
I suppose the hardest part in all of this, is the 'perhaps'.  Because, yes, the answer will most likely come, but before it does... that seven letter word is our dwelling place...

PERHAPS.

We think that we know what is best. Trust in the midst of the perhaps of our mind's wanderings, Beloved. In this dwelling place of perhaps that I find myself in, whether good or bad in and of itself, the best place to flee? Where I hear His voice.

 “...The sheep hear his voice, and he calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. When he has brought out all his own, he goes before them, and the sheep follow him, for they know his voice. A stranger they will not follow, but they will flee from him, for they do not know the voice of strangers.” --John 10:2-5

It's hard to lean in & listen. If you take note of all the situations He is moving in... every gift He blesses us with... joy will be your daily in-the-trenches song. It's not anything close to easy. The questions will be hard to live. Your heart will be on the edge of it's seat.

But is there any place a believer would rather be?

Leaning in on His promises, believing Him with every ounce of our being, waiting at His feet...

Why would we want to be anywhere else? Sure-- I would love all the answers, but I was once told that getting something you want rarely creates the character you need to receive it & that we shall enjoy the mystery.

So, why not live the questions?

Why not thank God for them?

Why not ask Him to NOT stop the madness?

Why not praise God for pain & confusion?

I would rather be near to Him & in the 'land of perhaps' over being resistant towards Him & have all the answers in my lap.

So, I'm gonna praise Him for all of these gifts in disguise. The grief hitting hard, the overwhelming to-do list, the mystery of perhaps... If I'm focused on all these things with a bitter heart my eyes are not on what is unseen. And, if my eyes are on the temporary to live will not be Christ. Why would I tarry there, then? If I'm focused on these things the righteous way, however, living will be Christ.

“Faith does not eliminate questions. But faith knows where to take them.” --in A Chance To Die by Elisabeth Elliot; the Life and Legacy of Amy Carmichael.
 

Our questions are not any less worthy of our attention when we lay them down in gratefulness; they are just no longer a burden on our already worn & weary shoulders. Lifting them up in prayer is our first step... & the most important one.

Perhaps the answer will not be what we wished it would be, but surely our goal will be achieved:

To walk in His perfect Will, to know Him, to perservere, to love along the way.

 

 

All that is unsolved in our hearts, Lord Jesus, You know. So, let's live the questions. Because, after all, where would we rather be? 

 

 

In Abba,

Emilee

 

 



february eighth two thousand thirteen.

It was a lovely day.

And, as many of you already know, it was my birthday.

Time has flown.

As my tradition goes I will give you pictures regarding my celebrations and take you along to all the day's activities if you weren't there otherwise. :)

I rang in the new age with my pooch... we were probably both snoring for all I know.
I usually wake up and greet the EXACT minute I was born with much persistant excitement, but I decided to just celebrate... sleeping... after I shut my alarm off... for probably the third time.

Then, as Madre and I got ready we jammed to Adele and Kari Jobe before heading to the Little Apple for a day of shopping. Yes, a girl that hates shopping always goes shopping on her birthday. Although, since I didn't have a time limit, it was very pleasurable.

Our stops?

• The Christian Bookstore.

Shocked much? An hour at the Christian bookstore leaves me happy... {even if I don't get anything.}That's exactly what we did. My purchases? Every book on my list of 17 books that I could find in the store--plus one that I couldn't resist. :)

1. A Chance To Die on Amy Carmichael by Elisabeth Elliot
2. The Wounded Healer by Henri Nouwen
3. Introverts In The Church by Adam Mchugh
4. Eat This Book by Eugene H. Peterson
5. Tenth Avenue North's album ''The Struggle"

• Then, we made our way to Applebee's.

 

Don't judge me for taking pictures of my meal. This is for you visual learners, I suppose. :)

 

Then, our waitress gladly let me have my birthday dessert WITHOUT the song. Needless to say,

no matter what she did wrong in serving us... she was a hero for this introvert. ;)

 

 

• Up next, Target.

 

 

• With time to kill, we cruised.

 

• The fulfillment of Emilee's birthday wish.

Can you guess?

 

 

 

My birthday wish was to go to Starbucks to read & study by myself. Every single time I have went in there before, although I love Starbucks & the people I go with nonetheless, I have always envied the people that can go by themselves.

 

 

My nest. :)

 

 

 

From my ever so lovely friend, Broseph... AKA Chloe. :)

 

• Homecoming!

It was our school's winter homecoming basketball game... I had babysat or was otherwise busy when all the other games had taken place so I finally got to go to one! It twas grand.

 

 

With Chloe and another sweet friend. :)

 

 

With that outline, I will close this post looking forward to coming to you soon. :) Really, really soon.

 

Teach me to number my days, Lord Jesus. Your will be done. We desire You so very much.

 

I got treasure up in heaven; I got dirt all over me,

Emilee 

 

explanations of my hatred for the 14th day.

If you haven't heard already, I hate Valentine's Day. In fact, I'm sure I am one of the biggest enemies of the stinkin' day. Everyone thinks I'm quiet until they get to know me or they hear my opinion of Valentine's Day. You have been warned.

Below are the reasons that I hate Valentine's Day in no specific order. Also, I'm including cards + videos from people that agree with my point of view. I'm sure I won't stray you one way or the other. You either love it or you hate it.

• The guys never win. Ever.

For example, a boyfriend gets his sweetheart nothing for valentine's day, because she said not to worry about it. So, because men tend not to over analyze, he doesn't really know that that meant that she secretly wants him to know her heart so well that he would know she REALLY actually does want something. Whoo, that was a 'mouth'ful.

Secondly, regardless of what instructions the girlfriend gave to the boyfriend, he got her something. It wasn't enough. Who knows how many other girls got the same thing she did? She wanted something personal, but he thought spending insert-amount-here stinkin' bucks would be enough. 

• Official Single Awareness Day.

 

I mean, really?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

All singles in general are lonely in some way, shape, or form enough on a daily basis. We don't need a stinkin' holiday to remind us that we are 'forever alone' and that someone out there is buying their sweetheart something that we aren't going to get... or that we aren't going to get something from a charming acquaintance we were really hoping would take the plunge.

 

BUT, if you do go out on Valentine's Day or just have a valentine of your own, seriously--pray for the singles in your life. If you think about me you can, but I'm thinking my teenage self will just

suck it up and get over my romantic self on the worst day of the year.

 

• It promotes fake love.

 

We are paper hearts, but we mustn't be torn up. . So, even though we DO want treats + presents... if the man's heart isn't in it it's worthless. She might as well throw it away. That's another reason the guy could be confused... no matter what the price tag is, for most of us, we just want to be cherished. We want a sign of that.

 

Plus, no satisfaction can come from a day, person, or material possession--in Christ alone can our hearts be filled. It's a continual practice. Our hearts are broken and we don't want to go back again and again... because it's painful. Only then, though, will true happiness and freedom come. It's hard to explain in a day-to-day way to understand, but I can tell you this for sure: constant communication with the Lover of our souls does wonders within one's self.

 

• The money factor.

BTW, the last point doesn't give you guys an out to not spend money ONLY because I said that. I'm just sayin'.

 

Back to the point, the marketing is outrageous. Why spend SO MUCH money on this day? How about February 15--the best day of the year? It represents everyday life + the beauty beheld THERE--not when everything is glamorous and covered up. I would rather have something then than because of a silly marketing scheme. Take note, future husband, wherever thou art.

 

 

• I don't like pink.

I may wear it, but I'm just not the biggest fan. The isles of red, pink, and all those cheesy sayings just... UGH.

• The stinkin' holiday sucks me in.

Maybe one of the worst things about it is that I REALLY do want something on valentine's day, but because of these reasons + more, I tell people I don't want anything. I am speaking in truth, though, when I say that I would rather have something on February 15th. Plus, buyers--it will be cheaper. :)
 It grips us hopeFUL romantics and never lets us go. Ever.

• It's overrated.

"Oh, honey, let's go out to eat tonight and wait an hour to spend $50 on a dinner that you don't even really want to go to?" Once again, the guys commitment.

I mustn't continue explainging this segment. It pretty much explains itself.

For now, that concludes my main rant. It's a small list in comparison to my passion about the subject.

On a better note: the reasons I tolerate the day.

• It gives gift-givers like me an excuse.

Like this states, it gives me an excuse to make someone's day a little brighter. You could call it some sort of courage-giver. Even though you should give randomly as well, sometimes you need an extra boost. Although, I may not take the 'excuse', it's there!

• It's my nephew's birthday.

Probably the only reason I don't say I wish the day didn't exist. I love that little guy.

That's all the good I can think of. For now. :)

 

^^Agreed.

 

 

On these last notes, men:

 

 

 

 

So, dear valentine, somewhere out there...

 

here's to you:

 

 

 

 

 

Weary and rejoicing,

Emilee