rain, rain, rain, rain, beautiful rain.

I stand on the warm, damp cement with my toes curled on the first stair of our front porch. As to not give into possibly having a cold... but I didn't want to miss the mist. Or the downpour. I let the rain wash away my makeup considering I hadn't yet taken the time to do that nightly ritual.

I am terrified of storms. Absolutely. Terribly. You see, though, God and I have a thing for rain.
I hug myself and put the hood of my hoodie on my head as if to shelter my somewhat still put together hair. While we lived in Mississippi I danced in the rain with my pooch. It poured. If I stood directly under the shelter of our front patio space it was as if I was in an outdoor shower. When I went in the house, soaked still in my pajamas, I glanced in my parent's master bathroom. The curls framing my face while my eyes were tired... I whispered, ''I want to be a missionary.''

Is this part of my fear? His magnificent awesome leading into something scary? Maybe it is beyond the childhood memory of a childhood storm... Or maybe I analyze things!

Tonight, I would sing the African song that I know, ''Rain, Rain, Beautiful Rain.''
I would glance back best I could to the moment that I imagine to be 4 'o' clock in the morning along the hills of Lake Victoria. That moment you realize you have more time to sleep, so you cuddle yourself back into your pillow asking sleep to hurry back. In that moment in Uganda, it was thundering. God was clapping. Clapping away my weariness; clapping away my loneliness; clapping away my fears; clapping away my pride. In a tent full of 5 women total, He was singing over me. As I like to imagine Him doing this night.

The Lord has been showing me His majesty and His tenderness lately... all in one.
The wind being violent and comforting at the same time, as well as the rain.
The thunder being God's clapping and His lightning His strobe lights coming down from the clouds. He clapped tonight in the way that send the little children to sleep in between the comfort of Mommy and Daddy. So, of course, that allows this hopeless romantic a time to daydream... and of my sweet children running in to find their rescue. As I gaze to the clouds, I am utterly in awe that I have been above those clouds. That means, when God sends a storm, He has to reach down farther to do so. ;)

I did myself the pleasure of a few twirls on my sidewalk... to tell Him that I accepted His dance. I accept His offer. Every offer. Every single day.

My hair is still frizzy from it, but I couldn't take it out quite yet. I had some memories to dig out again.

Listen to Him. He is clapping.

And in case ya'll couldn't tell...

It is raining in Kansas. :)

In Abba,

Emilee

Your majesty//gently washes over me//makes my heart begin to sing//joyfully.

~Joyfully by Kari Jobe.

Last night's beauty. :)

These are some of the extravagant beauty that was in Kansas last night. :) I was thankful that
I got to capture some of it- although pictures don't do anything justice. {First, I am going to add some Kansas beauty from Saturday afternoon.}

We are in the midst of wheat harvest. It is fun for us non-workers :)

This is one of my favorites.

Skip forward a little over 24 hours:

Glorious.

Layers of beauty.

Bottom left kinda looks like South America, doesn't it? :)

If that doesn't speak of His love and majesty I don't know what does. :)



Like an explosion in the sky that remains.

The Lord used some pastel watercolors on this one. :)

Wait till the end of this. I was so happy to get it. You can probably hear me say, ''YES!''

Until next time,
In Abba,
Emilee

after the mountain.

Any of us that have been a Christian for more than 5 minutes have had a spiritual high.
They most often come after being with a group of people- small or large- that engage into the heart of God together. It makes you want that all the time. So, because it truly is easy on the eyes to see that we jump in automatically. Praising Him; praying heartfelt. It is easy in that place. We can admit it.
Those places are crucial. Those places are also meant to be parted from.
If Christians could hang out at retreats every moment of every day of the year...
Well, we wouldn't get any lighting of the world accomplished if we didn't walk down from the mountain. But Jesus walks down the mountain with us.

Matthew 17

The Transfiguration

And after six days Jesus took with him Peter and James, and John his brother, and led them up a high mountain by themselves. ² And he was transfigured before them, and his face shone like the sun, and his clothes became white as light. ³ And behold, there appeared to them Moses and Elijah, talking with him. ⁴ And Peter said to Jesus, “Lord, it is good that we are here. If you wish, I will make three tents here, one for you and one for Moses and one for Elijah.” ⁵ He was still speaking when, behold, a bright cloud overshadowed them, and a voice from the cloud said, “This is my beloved Son, with whom I am well pleased; listen to him.” ⁶ When the disciples heard this, they fell on their faces and were terrified. ⁷ But Jesus came and touched them, saying, “Rise, and have no fear.” ⁸ And when they lifted up their eyes, they saw no one but Jesus only.

⁹ And as they were coming down the mountain, Jesus commanded them, “Tell no one the vision, until the Son of Man is raised from the dead.” ¹⁰ And the disciples asked him, “Then why do the scribes say that first Elijah must come?” ¹¹ He answered, “Elijah does come, and he will restore all things. ¹² But I tell you that Elijah has already come, and they did not recognize him, but did to him whatever they pleased. So also the Son of Man will certainly suffer at their hands.” ¹³ Then the disciples understood that he was speaking to them of John the Baptist.

Notice that Peter told Jesus the obvious. ''Lord, it is good what we are here. If you wish, I will make three tents here, one for you and one for Moses and one for Elijah.''

It was indeed good that they were there. It just wasn't His plan to camp there. Peter wanted to hang out with them. Completely understandable. Think about the

topics they could have discussed if they WOULD have camped out there! But if you read on,

think about how many wonderful things wouldn't have happened if they would have.

My Commentary points out:

They [Peter, James, and John] were later to be the witnesses of his agony, and this was to prepare them for that.

He doesn't give us these experiences for nothing. They have a purpose... and we discover them if we treat them properly.

He was still speaking.
We get ahead of Him, don't we? Trying to perusade Him when He is chasing after us.
We assume what would be best and act on it. There is a fine line between GOOD and RIGHT.
So, when Peter was still talking 100 miles a minute God made him and James + John fall to their faces.

Notice, that when the voice of God told them to listen to Jesus some of the first words out of his mouths were, ''Do not be afraid.''

I contemplate that meaning many things.
Obviously, He was telling them to not be afraid of the voice. Could he also have been saying, ''Do not be afraid to leave the mountain. I will go with you. My glory will still exist, even if you don't see it.'' And with my sense of humor I hear Him saying, ''And don't be afraid that you just made a total fool out of yourself. I still love you the same. :)'' Here in this moment we
see the mightiness of God and the tenderness of God-- within seconds. A fierce voice, a gentle touch.
The voice is crucial, but so is the touch. You cannot seperate the two characters of God.

Here is my insight about coming down from mountain top experiences. These are the reasons I believe we tend to fall and slip on our way:

• We do not hold onto the truth of the experience, but merely the high of it all. So, when we don't have that high we don't know how or what truth to cling to.
• We focus on the Mose's and the Elijah's. We don't see Jesus alone. They had just seen JESUS unveiling His beauty, but then wanted just a tent for Him-- and the exact same ones for Moses and Elijah. Although the fellowship has to take place, we can't have fellowship and make that our worship. The two are completely different... though there is a time for both. They blend by our making.

You will have a mountain. Praise Him through it while clinging to truth. You will need it.

These are just a few of the many insights I will share with you for today. This passage is so rich and full.

I pray that when I arise and when you arise when we are afraid, that we would see no one, but Jesus only.

In Abba,
Emilee

letting Him in.

There is a famous passage of Scripture that many people have heard in the context of an invitation to know Christ as Savior. ''Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door I will come in'' (Rev 3:20 NKJV). He does not force Himself upon us. He knocks, and waits for us to ask Him in. There is an initial step, the first step of this, which we call salvation. We hear Christ knocking and we open our hearts to Him as Savior. It is the first turning. But the principle of this ''knocking and waiting for permission to come in'' remains true well into our Christian life.

It might come as a surprise that Christ asks our permission to come in and heal, but He is kind, and the door is shut from the inside, and healing never comes against our will.
{boldness, Emilee's.}In order to experience his healing, we must also give him permission to come in to the places we have so long shut to anyone. Will you let me heal you?
He knocks through loneliness. He knocks through our sorrows. He knocks through events that feel too close to what happened to us when we were young- a betrayal, a rejection, a word spoken, a relationship lost. He knocks through many things, waiting for us to give Him permission to enter in.

Give Him permission. Give Him access to your broken heart. Ask Him to come to these places.
~ From John and Stasi Eldridge's book, Captivating.

I had never really thought of it that way. Sometimes, yes, we are to broken spiritually to get up and walk to the door, but just whisper, ''Come in.'' But maybe the reason we can't feel His presence in times such as this it's because we don't GET UP and answer that door! He is calling you by name...
His compassion is aroused, but a doctor cannot get ready to operate on a patient when the patient DOESN'T KNOW.  Healing doesn't come against our will. Hear His voice, answer the door.
Allow Him to romance you... in a way that only Christ can do. Restoring your soul; loving you; delighting in you; healing you. Give Him permission to minister to your heart.

Invite Jesus over for dinner tonight. Or dessert and coffee. Whatever. Just invite Him in... and the least of these... for He is knocking. Waiting for YOU. For you.

In Abba,

Emilee

passing through.

Mom and I went on a roadtrip last Wednesday. {Being my first day of Summer! Woot!}
We drove to my brother's house, stayed the night, and then took my nephew and niece along
with us to my Grandparent's home in Illinois. On the way to my Grandma and Grandpa's
we went through my hometown, drove by our old church, and went to eat at a little place
to eat in smalltown, USA having a population of 200.

While I lived in Mississippi and northwest Iowa all I could think about was Southeast Iowa.
Then, the LORD moved our family to Kansas. It was by no means my idea, but I went because it was what my parents wanted. Looking back, we all know that He specifically put us here for a very specific reason. This is home... for now. We love it. Sincerely and wholeheartedly.

You see, when visiting southestern Iowa while living in northern Iowa and Mississippi we would
feel familiar there. We felt like it was home. Home is a big word.

When going back to Iowa now I feel comfortable... It is indeed familiar.
BUT there is a big gap between familiar and home. I might not always
feel familiar in Kansas. I still feel like the new girl often, but
this is where the LORD has placed us. So we will see what other marvelous things He brings
about in this place.

While going through our home church, seeing old friends, eating at my childhood favorite
''restaurant'', all I could think was, ''I am just passing through.''
I love those people and fellowshipping with them; keeping in touch with them.
But I was just passing through. I had a home where my identity was found in different things
other than what I looked like when I was 5. I had a home where I felt I could be most impactful AT THAT TIME. I have a home, a church, a family, a lifestyle, a relationship with Christ,
that could have only happened if I would have moved away from my place of comfort. It wasn't easy moving... but oh! Am I glad we did!

We should have this passing through attitude all the time. We ARE NOT home.
We have Christ at our home. On earth though, we find Him through many things. We have a place where our identity IS in HIM all the time. I have a home where I will be with my Jesus forevermore. So, for now I will keep on blooming and glowing for Him in the way that He shows fit.
We shall surrender all, loving, and savoring this journey, because after all...

We are just passing through.

Home soon,
Emilee